Sunday, 29 June 2014

Reflections on the Past Year: Living with Depression, Upheaval & Knowing that the Hurricane Won't Last Forever

        As June draws to a close and the hot days of summer are upon us in the Northern Hemisphere I find myself both exceedingly warm and rather thoughtful. About this time last year, my world was rather in bits and pieces and home wasn't really home anymore. My parents were splitting up which is absolutely fine, I totally think its for the better, but it did mean that my life was a tad extra chaotic. I'd just moved back home after my first year of university to discover that I'd outgrown living with parents. Work was well work, filled with long hot days grilling hot dogs and burgers, the only part of which I am truly grateful for is a friend who I met who I know consider a sister <3. On top of everything I was diagnosed with depression, and I was in the middle of a major crisis of faith.... all in the single month of June 2013.


        But really why am I talking about all of this? Well, because I'm not in the same place anymore and because I want to let other people, who are in the middle of a rather large figurative hurricane, know that it will be okay. Being diagnosed with depression made me feel like I wasn't crazy, reaffirmed that wanting to throw up from stress and having a stomach that was alway upset did not mean I was dying, and really its always a comfort to know that you're not dying. To help cope with everything I was put on antidepressants which in case you are wondering are not 'happy pills' (a common misconception), they actually serve more as a stabilizer than anything else, yay for having an appetite again! After seeing counselling and being on antidepressants for precisely a year now, things are more stable in my life, sure I still have bouts of depression but they usually last a couple hours or so not a week.


        I guess what I'm getting at here is that its okay to be diagnosed with depression, its okay to get help, see a doctor, take antidepressants and talk to a counsellor, its okay. The hurricane won't last forever and you can pull yourself out, but that is a choice you have to make. It takes commitment and more than a little bit of effort to get out of bed and go about your daily tasks at first but in time it won't be as hard (you just won't want to leave bed because its cozy rather than because you're depressed). Take a breath, or two, look outside and appreciate the beauty of your surroundings whether the weather is sunshine, rain or storm. My counsellor once told me that thoughts are kind of like the tide, they ebb and flow, let the bad ebb away and let the good flow towards you, and take comfort in the fact that the hurricane really won't last forever.

   

2 comments:

  1. I have started to comment on this a dozen times easily and erased every one, so let me sum up instead: I like it :)

    ReplyDelete

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